Judul : KISAH SEDIH: Luahan Hati Bekas Pegawai FELDA
link : KISAH SEDIH: Luahan Hati Bekas Pegawai FELDA
KISAH SEDIH: Luahan Hati Bekas Pegawai FELDA
MELAYU JUGA YANG MENJAHANAMKAN FELDA
My husband was once a highly paid FELDA officer.
But it was not a long tenure as after awhile of being with FELDA, he kept telling me his conscience is not clear, once he knew too much.. and u know, Saif is the type of a person who knows no grey area. There is only right and wrong. White and black. Good and bad. Wrong and right.
He kept telling me, " Sayang, ini semua duit peneroka..duit orang kampung..duit peneroka how can they just lavishly spend like this.." at one point, i saw him close to shedding tears because he felt hopeless.. he kept saying, "melayu yang menjatuhkan melayu.. islam tapi tak macam islam"..
One day, something got printed at the wrong place, his place.. and he got furious looking at ghost figures.. and he questioned his superiors.. i guess over time he got picked in a way by his superiors for questioning where what went to and all..
From then onwards, he just couldnt run with the pack anymore.. From a big office, he was moved to a small office, later to a smaller office than to one futher away in a different building.. At one time I felt like he lost his strong persona..
For so many months he came back everyday with a stinging pain behind his neck.. I knew at that time that its very much high blood pressure related.. i dont want my husband to just snap and die.. So thats my call..
So one day i hugged him and said, "hey sayang, u know what.. leave ur job.. dont care about the money, the position, dont put it on urself to correct the wrongs, just leave the job.. i'm around, i pun kerja.. i'll make sure we'll be ok, we'll be fine.. i have you and you have me.. thats all we need.. leave ur job.."
So he left, even before he got any other job..
It was a hard time for both of us.. we have huge commitments on our head at that time bcz we just bought a piece of a premium land just sometime recent.. Thats on top of our existing housing loans.. He was around 31, I was around 27.. i wouldnt lie by saying i was not worried.. somedays i confide in my closest friends and just cry.. couldnt talk to Saif, wouldnt want to put pressure.. and wouldnt want to worry my parents and his..
It was such a worrying time.. But I was a supportive partner.. We are ok now.. took awhile to recover, lesser than half a year.. but that experience is a bad one as it gives my husband (who goes to Chinese school) a wrong impression of Malays at large..
He now thinks all Malays in power are either corrupted or, will fall for corruption.. Thats why he swore not to be involve in politics unless he is financially free bcz otherwise, it will be ur soul and principal for money and power.. Which is sadly most of the time,true..
I believe at this junction, there are more people who needs to be brought to the face of justice.. mana yang pergi LA nak bukak kedai supplement, yang pergi overseas on baseless business dealings.. spend beratus juta tapi produknya satu, dah la satu, suam suam kuku pulak tu.. yang bayar consultant hantu.. buat business decision pakai kepala lutut.. and on paper claim as ketirisan..
Mana semua orang tu? Their wrongdoings are all over overseas newspaper.. ada yg kena CBT ada lg yg belum i think..
I wish to see them in the same orange SPRM shirt..
Bcoz it breaks my heart to remember how sad Saif's face is everytime he tells me, "sayang.. ini semua duit peneroka.."
Even now, do u know what is Saif's dream? He always tell me that one day he will go back as somebody with power to fix FELDA, for he loves FELDA so much.. To him, the only way to save FELDA is to naikkan anak anak FELDA sendiri yang ada rasa cinta dan setia.. Thats his dream.. to serve and build the corporation so close to his heart.. but if you ask me, I would say, what is left of it?
FELDA, once upon a time a giant..
sumber: Tun Fiqa Mohammad
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